It has been a bit since I've had a new blog post. I'm sorry. It is not often that I admit when I’m struggling, but currently, that is where I find myself. I am in a mix of confusion and lack of organization with a side of brain fog. It’s already May, and we still haven’t found that perfect groove of the homeschool routine we have had the last few years. I know it’s just a season, and we will find our new routine eventually, but I feel like a brand new homeschooling momma, even though I’m entering year ten in our journey.
It’s hard to pinpoint one thing that’s caused these issues because, honestly, I think it’s a lot of things stacked on top of each other.
Our Struggles:
I’m preparing to transition Mouse, our oldest, thirteen, to high school next year. Preparing for high school has me researching and developing our graduation requirements and then different curriculum options or ways to fulfill the “credits” she will need to graduate and go onto her future career path (still not set on what she wants to do yet). I’ve been writing things down and discussing things with her so that we are on the same page and that she gets to help have input on what happens for her future. It’s time-consuming and overwhelming.
We go to the opposite end of the spectrum, and we add in another baby in September (our Baby Bee). While he has been our easiest baby regarding personality and sleep schedule, he still requires attention. He often prefers his Momma, even when reading history or working through division problems. Besides adding him to school, we’ve had to make adjustments to add him to our 5th wheel. Rebuilding our mid bunk to fit him and Bird into a room, along with adding and adjusting different baby needs, is a bit of a transition as well.
Also, add our Bird, who is three and eager to learn, but it is hard for me to figure out how to teach. She is a challenge because she’s not as content for structure as her older sisters were at her age. So when I’m not researching high school, I’m scouring again for alternative preschool plans that don’t involve worksheets and sitting still for more than a minute. Plus, the age gap differs from when I taught Mouse and Thumper together. Thumper, who is ten, was happy to listen in or play alongside me as I taught her sister. For Bird, listening to middle school world history and fourth-grade American history isn’t appealing.
To add to the mess, this year's school year got off to a staggered start as we ordered curriculum later than I usually do, and so we began staggering in subjects as they arrived at our home. This has thrown my usually somewhat organized brain off. We also haven’t found a solid routine like in the past. Working in time with Bird and Baby Bee’s feeding and nap schedule leaves us working in a somewhat broken routine.
Along with our lack of routine, our year is up in the air more than it has been, or maybe it feels that way. We spent the beginning of the year at home waiting out the archery season for the older girls, and then we joined Hubby in mid-April. We have about another six weeks in North Carolina. While my Hubby’s next job contract is almost settled, our housing situation is not. Using our fifth wheel for this next job isn’t a safe option for us. So until we can figure out housing or if housing costs are too much, the kiddos and I might have to return home.
All this has left me feeling a sense of mess this school year. I know it’s just a season, but at the moment, it can be overwhelming. I’m choosing not to let it be now that I’ve recognized our struggles. I’m leaning into the chaos and embracing our uncertainty. Here is what I do know:
Our kiddos are learning. It may not seem so, but a week or month goes by, and I see how far they have come from a struggle, and it makes my heart smile.
We are thriving as a family (having more happy together times than not). Friday Family fires, shouts of glee when Daddy-in gets home from work, and more.
Babies (and toddlers) are joyous, and I watch our big girls be the best big sisters ever.
This moment is only a fraction of our whole life, and it’s God's way of telling me to slow down, reevaluate, and, weirdly enough, rejuvenate myself in the process.
Most importantly, God has blessed me. I never thought I would be married, and then I thought we would struggle (even more than we did) to have children. I am blessed beyond measure.
I'm hoping to do better from here on out. So here is to writing blog posts from my phone, creating memories with my kiddos, and learning along the way.
As always, keep following our journey on our Facebook Page or Instagram. If you want more in-depth conversations, check out our Facebook Parent Group. More importantly, if you’re finding yourself in a struggle season, reach out (email or messages).